Virginity A virtue

“Virginity” often related to a woman’s purity has a lot of relevance even today in India. Irony is that non-virgin man also looks for a virgin woman as his wife. Before the sexual revolution in the west people gave great importance to a woman’s sexual chastity or virginity so much so that married men would put chastity belt, lock the belt around their wife’s reproductive or sexual organ and kept the key with them.

After the sexual Revolution in the early 1960’s things changed in the western countries and with the empowerment of women they became more confident and brave even in the matters of casual sexual activities. Things have been imitated greatly in India as in past two or three decades as women have come out  of their home to work as independent women, they have become more confident in terms of taking up a job, engaging as a business woman and they have also dared to engage in recreational or relational sex before marriage.

Live-in Relationships or premarital affairs have been seen as normal in bigger cities while in smaller towns and villages people engage in relationship in secrete in order to avoid public gaze, hence premarital affairs have become rampant everywhere. Blame it on the TV advertisement with sexually explicit content or the films portraying love before marriage or easy access of pornography.

Like pre-marital affairs extramarital affairs are also on a rise. The reason may vary from case to case. In India where the majority of the population consists of youngsters will see more such things in the future if necessary steps will not be taken by the younger generation to prevent the malefic influence of such relations. The consequences of pre-marital affairs range from break-up or separation out of silly or serious reasons, frequent change of partners, cheating in relationship to more grave issues like black-mailing by a previous partner or partners, Risk of getting exposed through an mms and even getting sexual diseases from unsafe sex cannot be out ruled. In pre-marital affair a woman most likely loses her virginity as her hymen raptures when she gets intimate with a partner, while in a man there is no such full-proof proven thing to know if the man was virgin before marriage or not. But truly saying virginity is more a myth as per doctors as it is impossible to know if a woman is virgin or not, the reason is 42% of females are born without a hymen while in so many women hymen is so elastic that it does not rupture to cause blood after intercourse. Women engaged in sports activities or strained physical activities are more prone to lose virginity.  

In western countries teenage pregnancy rate is high as from a very young age teenagers engage into physical activities out of curiosity or recreation, when they reach their adulthood most of them by that time would have lost their virginity or changed so many partners. The greatest disadvantage of such sexual freedom is people do not get satisfied in their relation and they look for someone constantly even being in a relation. That is why the divorce rate is higher in western countriescomparing to the eastern countries like India. In India though things are very rapidly westernizing still lots and lots of people try to stick to their partner for their lifetime. Marriage is a very holy institution where two people come together and exchange love, money, values and the ultimate purpose of oneness is achieved in a good marriage.

Loosing virginity is not a big deal for more freedom loving people in the new globalized India. As I mentioned earlier the consequences are always on the negative side for women who lose it before marriage to someone other than their future married partner. The reason is that a girl may face awkward question like “Are you virgin”, “did you have a relationship” etc. A lady may very politely say no and generally most of them say no as they do not want the marriage to break while men ask questions like how to know if the woman is virgin or not. Even lots of men feel bad when their wives do not bleed during the first intercourse. That is why plastic surgeons performing hymen-reconstruction surgery are on a demand due to our Hippocratic approach towards virginity.

Virginity is nothing but a state of mind. There is nothing of it related to virtue. A woman’s value does not deteriorate if she is not a virgin rather a man’s cowards approach towards virginity may make him a looser. Morality cannot be related to virginity. Morality is something to do with a partner’s trust, love and devotedness towards other partner. For a man who feels proud like a winner after taking his partner’s virginity should also be ready to feel the same pride if his lady love happens to be a non-virgin.

Manipulation in love just for sexual gratification is illegal as well as immoral. Loosing virginity for a woman is more unfortunate when she loses it to a manipulative lover. Those who have concern about virginity of women and relate it to their character should also look into themselves if they have a clean character. Believe in one thing that when you enter into someone’s life and you fall in love with the person you should never delve into her past life and feel bad if you find that she had a relation with her previous partner or partners because you were not in her life in the past, she might have a different state of mind, she might have a different circumstance in her life, she might be in love with the previous partner or she might have subjected to manipulation or physical abuse. If you love someone you should have no guilt feelings about your partner’s past. Nothing is more pure, virgin like love.

For the entire world sex is a wonderful physical expression. It is such physical expression that the trade of sex runs in billions of dollar whiles the sex industry is as big as any other industry. Aesthetic portrayal of sex converted it into a dirty body-trade and a mere physical act of sense gratification. We have forgotten that sex is a more sacred expression of love which unites the male and female. The union or oneness that sex brings promotes love, faith and enlightenment. Remember that Buddha achieved enlightenment after having through a union with his wife.      


By : | Category : Health & Science| Sub Category : Health & Education|Date : December 21,2014

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